la grippe d’oiseau (2)
Posted 28 February, 2006 in that is f'ed up.
This bird flu thing is crazy. I have been trying to ascertain whether it’s possible to survive it if you are young, strong, and have good medical treatment, but no news reports have been able to tell me. Are we all going to die from this, or what? I need to know.
I find it hard to believe that in the 21st century a disease could wipe out a large chunk of the world’s population. What the hell? We have robots and lasers, but we can’t really do anything about the flu? But it was also hard for me to believe that New Orleans’ levees were weak enough to break like they did. Why haven’t we figured this shit out already? I always thought the end of the human race would come from a nuke, not the bird flu. That would be more dramatically interesting, because what we created will destroy us, and so forth. But everyone dying from the flu? That is honestly a bit rubbish.
They should make a TV show about the bird flu outbreak, with a post-apocalyptic landscape and a hot chick like Dark Angel or Buffy. But that might also be a bit rubbish–people would fight over Tamiflu, and blow their noses a lot, and lie in beds. The whole show would have to take place in a hospital, and all the lead characters would keep dying and needing to be replaced. Plus people don’t tend to talk much when they have the flu, so there would not be much witty repartee, especially if everyone is dying. And if there really is an outbreak of bird flu, who is going to watch the show about bird flu? We’ll all be dead!
Where is a good place to flee when the bird flu comes? Does anyone know? And will we all have to eat red meat all the time because there will be no more chickens? Does washing your hands help in any way at all, or should you not bother? It seems like it would just be much easier to go this route: when the bird flu looks like it’s getting really bad, we will all nuke each other at once. Someone will chicken out at the last minute of course, probably Russia, but then the bird flu will get them anyway.
It’s sad that the headlines on Yahoo are stories like “Oscars could elevate fresh faces to stardom,” when they really should say “WE ARE PROBABLY ALL GOING TO DIE FROM BIRD FLU SOON AND NO ONE HAS FOUND A CURE YET BECAUSE INSTEAD OF WORKING ON IT THEY ARE DOING STUFF LIKE WATCHING THE FUCKING OSCARS.” Still, I am also going to watch the Oscars, because I am not a scientist. But if you know any scientists, tell them to get back in the lab and solve this bird flu business, because it is starting to worry me.