top ten ridiculously gimmicky hip hop songs (13)
Posted 31 October, 2003 in music
in no particular order:
1. nelly, hot in herre. ah yes, everyone knows this one. nelly is quite right, many of us girls like to dance naked in front of the mirror while on the phone with our friends and complain about how our butt gettin’ big. what remarkable insight! he wishes.
2. sisqo, the thong song. dumps like a truck? i know if a guy said that to me, i’d be incredibly flattered. thank you for complimenting my dumps! i beep when i back up, too.
3. black rob, whoa. this song is like whoa. i can’t even explain it. it’s just…whoa. and all the things he talks about in the song are whoa. he’s just whoa. contemplating why he got a record contract makes me be all, like, whoa.
4. big tymers, get your roll on. this one is all about the video. spinning ferraris and lambos with gullwing doors. fat whips galore. this was from the heart of the bling-bling era, and the conspicuous consumption is a sight to behold. maybe i can get a cheap F40 from impound when the big tymers get dropped from their deal and have to default on their car notes.
5. dmx, y’all gon’ make me lose my mind! up in here! up in here. dmx is scary. i don’t want to make him lose his mind, act the fool, or any other stuff. he needs to chill before he bursts a blood vessel.
6. outkast, hey ya. i actually don’t like this song much. i can’t get into the beat. but the idea of shaking it like a polaroid picture is hilarious and actually pretty original.
7. missy elliott, work it. this song actually embarrassed me when i first heard it. i don’t want to know about missy shaving her cha-cha! plus, what’s the deal with her making offensive chinese-person noises? that’s not cool. still, i crank it when it comes on the radio, but i won’t be flipping it and reversing it any time soon.
8. chingy, right thurr. chingy. that’s all i have to say. chingy. want to be nelly much, chingy?
9. ying yang twins & lil jon, get low. lil jon has recently been declared the top shouting guy in rap. this is much like nate dogg’s situation. he’s one of the only guys in the gangsta rap world who can actually sing well. therefore now he sings on EVERY DAMN SONG. likewise for lil jon, who shouts any opportunity he gets, in any song that will have him. he’s the p.diddy of shouting.
10. ludacris, move. this is one of my favorites. move, bitch, get out the way! that’s what i feel like when i am driving home from work. l.a. drivers suck ass.
honorable mention: the ludacris song with the chickens in the back yard having sex. do chickens even have sex like that? sticky icky icky! also, the ludacris song where he talks about having so many diamonds that it “feels like a midget is hanging from my necklace.” about as PC as missy and her chinese-boy thing, tho.